Verified answer

Self-destructive/self-defeating behavior may also be a subconscious (not something one recognizes as a motivator) means of drawing the attention of others, so that they can provide help. It is more effective to directly seek help from a properly qualified counselor. A psychotherapist cannot provide a cure, they can only provide guidance toward techniques that have worked for others, and some treatment relies on changing behavior.

Behavior comes down to habit, change your habits to change yourself. Thinking positively about one’s self and doing what needs to be done (particularly when it is hard to do) can go a long way, and thinking positive thoughts is more effective than trying to suppress negative thoughts. “Conscious parts of the brain train other parts of the neural machinery, establishing goals and allocating resources” (Eagleman, “Incognito: The Secret Lives of the Brain”). Establishing a habit to replace a habit that is the result of many years of practice is very difficult, particularly if it involves behavior that has become a character trait. If you start slow and gradually increase you will have a better chance of making it a habit. Of course, it will take 3 weeks or more to establish a replacement habit, and longer if it involves a firmly entrenched trait. One must commit to doing something they find difficult to do, and make gradual steps toward a goal (the psych concept of successive approximation).

All mental and physical processes are electro-bio-chemical in nature. And, depression can be triggered by defective assimilation of sugar. One should not underestimate the effects of proper diet (minimal sugar and saturated fat, avoiding processed and refined foods and soft drinks, minimal fast food; seek out vegetables, fruits, beans, legumes, seeds, nuts, a small amount of whole grains, deep sea fish, poultry, and an occasional small amount of lean meat; but treat yourself occasionally), avoiding drugs (legal and illegal) and alcohol, and adequate sleep (consistent each day and preferably more than 7 hours , but note that excessive sleep can have negative effects), which are essential for optimal physical and mental functioning. Depression and schizophrenia are associated with low levels of omega-3 fats, and a high ratio of omega-6 to omega-3 fats. And, meditation has been proven to reduce stress (many books are available). The American Journal of Physiology (Sep 2011) explained how exercise improves memory, treats depression, and makes people feel better. Also, self-absorption can be associated with some level of depression.

Guided imagery is a common technique in improving athletic performance and in cancer treatment, among other things. It involves mentally picturing a specific image or goal and imagining oneself achieving that goal. Those with cancer are taught to imagine their bodies fighting cancer cells and athletes are taught to see themselves executing their stressful behavior with proper form. In this case, one could imagine the creation of new neural connections and weakening of old neural connections (or both). Guided imagery: http://www.healthjourneys.com/free_audio.asp

Depression self-help: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_teen_te... http://www.helpguide.org/mental/depression_tips.ht...

WebMD depression health check:

http://www.webmd.com/depression/default.htm

National Mental Health Association Hotline

800-969-NMHA (6642)

American Psychological Association therapist locator: http://locator.apa.org/

American Mental Health Counselors Association, Public Resources: http://www.amhca.org/public_resources/default.aspx

Self-pity is easily the most destructive of the nonpharmaceutical narcotics; it is addictive, gives momentary pleasure and separates the victim from reality.

John W. Gardner

No one saves us but ourselves. No one can and no one may. We ourselves must walk the path.

Buddha

A man is but the product of his thoughts, what he thinks, he becomes.

Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948)

If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.

Marcus Aurelius (A.D. 161-180)

The mind is its own place, and in itself

Can make a Heaven of Hell, a Hell of Heaven.

John Milton, Paradise Lost, Chapter 1 (1667)