Hi, I'm a 16 year old female. I'm the middle child of 3 daughters and live with both my parents however they fight a lot. When I was 11 my dad left home for the first time but it was only for a week, he leaves a lot but always comes home after a while. The longest time he left was for 3 weeks. However, my father has bought an apartment and plans to move into it after my older sister is dropped off at college (This august). A few years ago when i was 13, I was bullied by a group of girls in my grade, i would be so scared i spent recess hiding and would only leave school until all the girls had left. I would go home and sleep before I had lunch or did anything else I just get into bed and my mum noticed that something was wrong but I don't talk to her about my life (we don’t have such a good relationship) so she only officially found out when the school gave them a worrying phone call. I am now best friends with some of those girls and so there is no reason to remain "depressed" about that. The effect of the bullying should have worn off. For about 4 years now, I’ve had extreme mood swings. I've had days of major depression where i fake being sick to stay in bed and avoid going to school. At social outings I sometime get really upset and leave early without knowing the reason for why I feel so bad. I may burst into tears for no particular reason.There are times where I am extremely irritable and want to do nothing but sit in the dark under the covers. I have a terrible temper and often get into rages, when i get really angry with my siblings i may physically hurt them and my mother always tells me what a difficult child I am. At other times I feel quite normal but it doesn't last long. And sometimes I am over the top happy and nothing can bring me down i feel more sociable than ever, I'm laughing making jokes, singing, having the time of my life that my friends tell me I'm not acting normal and my mother says that if i weren't at home all day she'd say i was on something or drunk. My energy levels would be over the top and I’m probably the happiest most bubbly person alive. I feel like a puppet and no one knows who's pulling the strings. About three years ago I started cutting and ice-burning (ice & salt burns) myself when I got upset or angry but recently the cuts and burns have increased and i do it much more often. I got caught cutting in school once, it was a terrible day i felt so depressed for no reason, i was crying hysterically and had no control over myself. it was one of the worst and most embarrassing days of my life. At a party once i was dancing with this guy when i suddenly felt so sad i started crying and screaming and felt depressed for the rest of the party. Someone thought that the screaming and sudden crying was because i was wasted and attempted to force me to vomit but i had had only 2 glasses and i could walk properly and so i was not even tipsy. Last year at a summer camp I attended someone caught cuts on my arm and I was put into the health center for 4 days until my parents had to take a 12 hour flight to pick me up, I felt as if I was in a mental hospital. I tried to run away from the health center numerous times they even assigned someone to “keep an eye on me” yet I managed to run away I was brought back to the health center in a security car and it was scary. They’d call my parents and tell them “your daughter is on the loose on campus” as if I was some nut case. My grades this year have gone down tremendously, they started decreasing about 2 years ago but this year i failed 5 subjects in the first semester and 2 in the second. Even at 16 I still have nightmares that keep me up at night and I have trouble sleeping it takes me hours to fall asleep and i wake up numerous times every night. And i have gained more weight this year than i have ever gained (I’m not overweight , I just gained weight). I was diagnosed with ADD but i think it's not ADD and has something to do with another mental disorder. I don't feel normal and i've lost friends because of my constant extreme mood swings they always tell me i'm either too happy or too sad i have no in-between and sometimes i do feel that way. I've been going to a therapist since february and i don't see myself getting anywhere. She's not the first therapist i've been to, i've been to two others over the past 3 years and nothing is working with me. My mother also tells me i always blow things out of proportion. When i fought with her one time i ran away from home for about 7 hours. My boyfriend cheated on me with a younger girl 3 times i forgave him the first 2 times but the third time i unwillingly let go and i was depressed and lonely for about a month.

I am also very sensitive to some noises/sounds for example when in the car and the radio is on if the window is rolled down and i can hear moving cars it gets me so angry and irritated.

I have also been diagnosed with "mild general anxiety"

I also have specific phobias;

dogs

the sea

tests (test anxiety)

etc...