I'm 15, I have medium layered blonde hair, glasses that magnify my eyes and make them look HUGE because I have bad eye sight. I wear my hair up most of the time because its so thick, I have a huge forehead, my acne is horrible. I'm also tall compared to a lot of girls, I'm 5'8" and I'm so insecure about it because guys like short guys and not tall ones. I could go on and on, I never had a boyfriend or ever had a guy look at me and my family thinks I'm gay because no guy likes me what so ever. I always compare myself to my cousin (Which she's also my sister/best friend) She's 18, has a boyfriend and the perfect relationship with him, she's outgoing and very pretty and has a good life and she's happy but me.. I'm ugly, I never get called pretty and I try my best to look it but it doesn't work. I'm skinny, but have a lot of stomache fat so I look horrible when I sit down and I just look horrible. I'm crying right now because ill never be good enough, ill never be pretty enough and don't know what to do. Don't make up something that everyone would say 'Oh I bet your pretty' and stuff like that, isn't society based on how you look? That's why I feel empty inside.. Unless your pretty your life is crap and that's how it's always been and I can't take it anymore. I don't know what to do. Help... Created by ally. social-science-en - psychology-en

Severe self esteem issues?

May 2021 3 31 Report

Severe self esteem issues?

I'm 15, I have medium layered blonde hair, glasses that magnify my eyes and make them look HUGE because I have bad eye sight. I wear my hair up most of the time because its so thick, I have a huge forehead, my acne is horrible. I'm also tall compared to a lot of girls, I'm 5'8" and I'm so insecure about it because guys like short guys and not tall ones. I could go on and on, I never had a boyfriend or ever had a guy look at me and my family thinks I'm gay because no guy likes me what so ever. I always compare myself to my cousin (Which she's also my sister/best friend) She's 18, has a boyfriend and the perfect relationship with him, she's outgoing and very pretty and has a good life and she's happy but me.. I'm ugly, I never get called pretty and I try my best to look it but it doesn't work. I'm skinny, but have a lot of stomache fat so I look horrible when I sit down and I just look horrible. I'm crying right now because ill never be good enough, ill never be pretty enough and don't know what to do. Don't make up something that everyone would say 'Oh I bet your pretty' and stuff like that, isn't society based on how you look? That's why I feel empty inside.. Unless your pretty your life is crap and that's how it's always been and I can't take it anymore. I don't know what to do. Help..

Social Science / Psychology

Verified answer

First of, stop being so hard on yourself. The ONLY reason you think you're ugly is because you have low self esteem. And your self esteem is making you look at yourself in a bad way.

Stop comparing yourself to your cousin. It won't do you any good.

But seriously, everything you mentioned, is caused by your self esteem. If your self esteem was high, you would feel good about yourself whether people called you pretty or whether you had a boyfriend or not. You just need to higher your self esteem and all these problems will be gone!

Now, if you don't like how your glasses look, wear contacts. If you don't like your acne, find something to get rid of it. Those products they make nowadays. But acne is just a phase, it will go away in a few years.

And why are you insecure about being 5'8? Do you know how many people wish they were taller? Tall is elegant! I'm 5'8 and I love it! tbh, i wish I was 5'9. :p But i'm happy being 5'8. :)

I have low self esteem too, and believe me, no matter how many people tell you your pretty or no matter how many boyfriends you can get, if your self esteem is low, that crappy feeling you have about yourself will ALWAYS come back.

So the only solution to your problems is to higher your self esteem. It's really not easy but it's possible. Either get a therapist, or search online on how to make your self esteem higher. I'm reading a book right now about how to look at yourself in a positive way. It is very good. I would give you the name but it's in dutch, but there are plenty of books in english that you can buy that will help you.

When you have a high self esteem, you won't care what anyone thinks of you anymore, you won't look at yourself in such a negative way and you will even look at your flaws in a positive way. After all, everyone has flaws. You'll be a way happier person. Work on it. :)

You'll grow into your looks, and by the way your morals, and relationships are much more important than looks. I struggle with low self-esteem too. :(