How to help raise a girls self esteem?
A friend of mine is incredibly beautiful and talented, but for some reason has no self esteem.
I tell her that she is a great singer, that she is gorgeous, she has nothing to worry about, and that nobody except her sees that flaws that she sees, but nothing seems to work.
Does anyone have any tips? I act as positive as possible, but nothing seems to get her out of the mood that she's in.
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ask her out man. And slowly but surely, she will open up to you and you can get to the bottom of things... Besides, it sounds to me like you really like this person and genuinely care for her. I can't answer this question because there's a reason for her being this way and... I don't know what is causing her to tick. If you like this person, ask her out. Even if she says no, keep being supportive. I'm sure one day, you will reach her as friend or perhaps as lover. I have faith in you ;-)
Good luck.
Its probably depression, or a case of PMS, where she thinks something is wrong with her that is not for some time. It could also be that she thinks shes "fat" so she feels no matter what anyone sais, if she doesnt like everything about how she looks, she wont. Thats common, and again, normally a case of PMS, which only lasts I believe about a month tops, sometimes a little longer, sometimes a little shorter, not exactly sure, im not a doctor.
I would suggest on your part, take her mind off of it every time she brings it up. You can keep telling her that shes all this stuff, but it wont affect her, if she doesnt believe it for whatever her reasons.
Nobody can raise another person's self-esteem. She needs to find her own reasons to love herself. Her poor self-esteem could be connected to anything really. Bad parents, molestation as child, past emotional trauma. Mine came from my parents because no matter how hard I tried to get them to say they were proud of me, they never did. So I grew up thinking I was worthless. I had to walk away from that part of my life and rebuild from scratch. In order to help her, you have to tell her you're concerned and see if you can work together to find the root of her problem and fix it from there.
Tell her it's all about the placebo effect. If she makes her self believe she isn't worth it, than it will be harder for her to have a successful life. If she believes what you describe her to be, than she will lead a successful life at the same time, attract the right people to her.
Continuing to tell her she's beautiful. Maybe slip notes everyday in her book or locker or binder that say "you are beautiful" with a heart but make sure the writing/font is different from yours or she'll know its you. And then tell random people to tell her she's beautiful, when they walk by her. Idk something like that
Dont. Let her die. She has no reason to live.