colorful lights that shines bright
on a christmas tree on a wonderful night
when santa clause comes down to vitsit
all the little boys and girls have biscuts
they wanted to give him cookies and milk instead
but their mother said they are only rookies so they can make breads
santa laugh and laugh at the present he got
and sneak to the trees ang gave them what he brought.
Thabk you. What changes should I make?
Copyright © 2024 QUIZLS.COM - All rights reserved.
Answers & Comments
Verified answer
You might make it trochaic, for rhythm, since you are started most lines with a stress. Are you opposed to punctuation? Most poem lines start with caps, and Santa Claus is a proper noun. You could have rearranged some lines to rhyme.
they felt instead that tradition gave him milk and cookies
but mother said it must be bread for they were rookies
The part about rookies and bread doesn't make much sense. I would change that to something else; there are lots of words that rhyme with instead. Besides that, it's not bad.
Just the spelling. Everything else is fine.