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Its high time you start working out. Dont worry, you will feel proud of yourself one you start working out on your fitness.

Hi Marie,

I'm really sorry you're struggling so much with your self-esteem.

When you were 40 pounds, your Body Mass Index was 17.8 which is well into the 'underweight' category and now at 50 pounds it's 22.2 which is right in the middle of the 'normal' and 'healthy' weight range. But that's just repeating what your family has already told you.

I wonder what led you to gain 10 pounds and how long it took to gain that weight? You seem really unhappy about the way your body is now, and I wonder how you were feeling when you were gaining weight? It's always good to keep active and eat a balanced diet and it might be that you could do some toning work so you feel happier with your belly. You said you used to have a great figure at 40 kilos. Were you happy then? How do you feel about the other things in your life now?

I'm in the UK and I don't know a lot about what services are available to you in the US, but it sounds like it would be really good for you to chat through with someone independent and supportive about how you feel and what you'd like to do. If you msg me I'd be happy to help you find a safe space to do that exploring.

Well maybe you did look skinny then and healthy now. A good portion of people with a poor body image and resulting self esteem do not see themselves how other people do. You could be like that, because to be honest, even size 10 is fairly skinny.

Other than that, maybe you should go and see a doctor or nutritionist, or join a gym and get an instructor, because then you could get help and support in looking how you want to look, or in being told that you are fine. Whatever fits best =)

But tbh so many girls say that they are fat. My own girlfriend is unhappy with her weight and stomach, much to my confusion as it doesn't even stick out, it's flat! It must be installed in you girls so strongly and I don't understand why. Girls are more attractive when they're not skinny, most guys will agree!

I'm twenty too, and I know how that can be. I know a lot of women who are beautiful at your size, but if you're really unhappy and like how your body is, try joining a fitness group or class, something fun like hip-hop aerobics or yoga. You'll meet a lot of people who are also trying to get healthy, and that will give you really helpful support with sticking to your goals. Especially at our age, its good to start eating healthy and exercising regularly to create healthy patterns for later, when we'll really need them to feel and look our best!

That said, just because you don't feel as great as you used to doesn't mean nobody will find you beautiful and interesting. I've gained a little recently and wasn't very happy about it, but my boyfriend actually LOVES the new (or bigger) curves. If you love yourself and own your looks, you can be sexy at a 2 or a 14. Being healthy is a good choice, but attractiveness is much more about confidence than actual looks, in my opinion.

Look into some diets. Or if you enjoy salad like I do you can make any meal into a salad.I made sirloin steaks lelast night and cut up lettuce green onions croutons and the steak and it was amazing. I also added a little corn that I made for my husband. Just eat healthy and when you go to a store park a little farther away anything to get more excercise helps even a little bit! :) And don't worry everyone has weight trouble.. I need to get into shape too if that helps! But winter time doesn't help anybody get things done lol

The way that I was able to help with my self-esteem when I was about your age was to look at myself in the mirror and tell myself ALOUD every morning, that I was happy, healthy, and worthy of being liked.

I repeated it every time I went into the bathroom, and again at night before I went to bed.

As you are doing that, find someone who can help you find the best way for you to lose the weight in a HEALTHY manner.

Always remember... your body is not you. You are your personality, your friends, your family, and all of the other things that cannot be changed by simply putting on a pair of jeans.

Be happy with you.

First of all, this is a predominately American website, I believe, so I had to actually translate those numbers in my head to what I imagine they mean in English. I assume, and this is a rough estimate, you mean you're 5 foot 2 and 190 pounds. You used to weight 160, which is still heavy. A look how far you've come (sarcasm).

Haha, you look like your pregnant! Did anyone ever come up to and was like they were like uh "Hey are you pregnant?" Haha! That's such an awkward thing if you're not! Haha!

Well i dont know meters and kilos but if you really want to be happy then lose the weight. Stop eating so much and go outside and walk or something. Go to the gym. If your not happy with yourself then change yourself until your happy. Its your life not anyone elses.

did you know more money ( millions ) are spent on bullshit weight loss bars, books, videos , diets then there are on gym memberships per year? lazy way outs never work! iam a mother of 3 , all under the age of 6 and i stand 5'1 and 105 pounds. people say iam " lucky" and sometimes put me down for being thin. I assume its cause there own low self esteem but what they dont realise is , it causes self esteem isshues for me also.

Iam alot like you. No matter what , i am never happy with myself. if my weights good, its the tone ness of my belly. once thats ok , its my legs, its my breasts , its everything. then....people start on me on how thin and sick i look , so i gain, and it all starts over again. self esteem is a awful thing. I think its something that starts from childhood , and grows on us as adults.

To loose weight? hum. everyone laughs at me when i say this, but its True. I drink coffee..alot of coffee.. I have a timmys in the morning ( 4 sugar 4 cream...) make sure you brush alot. lol. alot of sugar. I feel full from the amount of cream and coffee. and the sugar fuels me with energy. Lunch time, coffee time. i am ready to roar again for hours. I do eat something light at supper time ( same size plate as my 5 yr old . ) normally chases supper with coffee....yep , 3 a day, thats 12 sugars. crazy i know. and i am not suggesting its healthy, cause i am pretty sure its awful. i do take Vitimans, and i do walk alot also. i have a doggy and 3 small kids so i never stop. but i sware , the coffee fills me up and keeps me energized all day and i just burn burn burn. i dont suggest you do this, as i know its not great advice. but i do state , its my lifestyle. and iam very petite. i can shop in the kids sections at the stores, and wear matching outfits as my daughter. if you do go the weight watchers way , save your money, go to walmart and buy " dance your pants off " ritchard simmons. hes awsome. lost alot of weight after 1st child with him. lots of fun, good music, and it really works!

10 kilos is not a lot to lose. Just do Pilates exercises to get in shape (you can find free instructions on how to do them all over the internet) and try to cut down on empty calories like soft drinks, juices, sweetened coffee and snacks and you'll be back in shape by the end of Spring .

Size 6 is skinny, too skinny. Size 10 is slim and a lovely, lovely size. Be fit and healthy, sure, but just don't go anorexic, ok?